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Old 03-12-2018, 07:03 PM   #1
MiaSanMia
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Default If ever any of you Naval Aircrewmen trainees consider a DOR... (motivational)

Don’t. Do it.

As a lifelong civilian, I’m not sure how much my opinion’s going to count for around here, but I’m going to put it out there anyway.

Several years ago, I learned of the Naval Aircrewman rate and attempted to enlist in the Navy. I was turned down due to my vision, which was very poor from an early age. Over the years, I had made numerous attempts to join each branch of service and was denied entry every time. I even made it to the waiver process for the Navy and the Air Force; it’s a cruel reminder that just because there’s a will, doesn’t mean there’s a way.

Serving in the military, particularly the Navy, was a dream of mine for as long as I can remember. Suffice it to say, being unable to serve was unspeakably disappointing and I languished for many years because I couldn’t achieve my dreams, enduring much failure along the way. That said, it wasn’t until I came across this thread here on NavyDEP last year and a similar one on Reddit that I realized what an incredible opportunity I missed out on.

Entitled as this might sound, I feel as though I was deprived of a chance to do what amounts to a dream job for me. I, too, eat, sleep, and breathe the interests and passions that motivated people like Haasino to enlist and become Naval Aircrewmen. I read Tom Clancy novels and played Harpoon as a kid and one day hoped I’d be in such an incredible line of work as well. It hurts tremendously to know such a career exists and I could never be a part of it. I know in my mind joining the military was never really an option considering my vision, but my heart believes otherwise. I spend a lot of time wondering if things could’ve worked out differently had I tried earlier and directed the energy and time pursuing other fruitless endeavors towards joining the Navy. You get what you give, after all.

This isn’t an attempt to elicit sympathy, thought it does serve as good therapy to lay out these thoughts and feelings. My point is to give yourself a moment of pause and think long and hard if you, at any point in your training, contemplate a DOR. I know the military doesn’t love everyone back; some people are downright miserable in the service, often because they’re doing a job they find unfulfilling in some way. And, as folks like Haasino point out, some simply don’t have what it takes to be successful and they often don’t find out until after they’ve enlisted and begun training. It’s a tough place to be in, one that I can relate to because I’ve had similar experiences in other careers.

On the topic of other careers, I don’t think I have to be a Naval Aircrewman to know there isn’t anything quite like it in the civilian world. Moreover, I don’t think the civilian world offers anything close to the sense of community, purpose, and rewards the military provides. I’m in a better place now than I was years ago, but it’s still well far off the mark from where I once thought I’d be. Every day, I grind my body, mind, and soul down to perform deeply unsatisfying work in an industry of mediocrity, wondering what could’ve been had my refractive error had been better by just two diopters or if I’d simply tried harder to join the military instead of wasting time trying to be a part of things I had no business being a part of. Living with regret and meditating on the “what-ifs” is a no-win proposition, but I’d be dishonest if I said it didn’t weigh on my mind on a regular basis. You’ve likely chosen to be Naval Aircrewmen because you seek to live your lives to your fullest potential. In return, Life has afforded you an incredible, priceless opportunity and it’s your duty to make something out of it. I don’t think I’m far off the mark in saying you’re never going to attain the sense of fulfillment you’ll come to possess in the military anywhere in civilian life.

If ever you consider a DOR, stop and think about exactly why you’re considering a DOR and try to remember why you chose this path in the first place. I know from reading threads like these that the training pipeline is incredibly tough and requires nothing less than your A-game every day. But also remember that the training pipeline to become a fully-qualified AW lasts only two to three years. It may seem like a while, but life passes by pretty quickly. More importantly, remember the pay-off that awaits you at the end of that road. The best things in life really are worth sticking around for, so don’t let the challenges and grind break you down. Unless you want to go down the road I did, working unfulfilling jobs that take so much from you, yet offer so little in return, all the while haunted daily by memories of bad choices and thoughts of what could’ve been, suck it up and suffer in silence. You’ll be better off for it, because that’s the price you pay for doing remarkable things.

They say it’s never too late, but the fact is, some things in life only permit a brief window of opportunity to accomplish. Don’t let it close on you, especially when you’re partway through that window. Whatever comes to pass, I wish you all the best and hope it rewards you in every way imaginable.
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